Firstly, as their name implies, they are a family and they are hosting me for the duration of my stay, provided we don’t run into some major potholes down the road. They are Christians and fairly active in their church. They seem to own some land in the hamlet, as we daily have fresh sweet corn to boil.
There is a father, a mother, an elder sister at what used to be called a normal school in the United States (i.e. a school for training teachers), a younger sister in Middle School, and a baby brother, perhaps in his first years of schooling if he goes to school at all.
The father, W. abeoji seems to be in between jobs. [A note on names: W. abeoji is not actually my host father’s name. Rather, W. is the name of his son and abeoji is the Korean word for father. It seems that in familial relations, the parent’s are referred to in relation to the eldest son. Thus, when I talk about W. omeoni (웅진 어머니) below, I am essentially writing “W.’s Mom”.] At one time, he was a florist, at another a tow truck driver, and now he sits at home and studies all day for an exam to become some sort of government official that monitors farming or helps farmers. I’m not exactly clear on what this is, but when I find out, I will let you know. He always has a smile on his face, though, especially when we try to communicate while we are both home alone. This happens often because of the situation the rest of the family is in.
The mother, W. omeoni, runs a beauty/movie rental shop. This keeps her out of the house most of the day from what I can tell, thus W. abeo cooks most of my meals. I was invited to come along to pick W. omeo up from the store once by W. abeo. This usually happens around 9:00 pm when W. omeo closes up shop. While there, I was invited to peruse the video section, and W. omeo began quizzing me on which movies I had already seen. There were quite a few that I hadn’t seen already (mostly ones that had been released in last four years of my life, i.e. college), but she was amazed at how many I had seen. I tried, unsuccessfully, to explain to her that we had a large projection screen at home and about 400 DVDs to boot. W., from what I can tell, spends most of his day with his omeoni, though he may also be going to school during the day.
I also learned on this trip to the shop that R., the youngest sister, usually drops by around the shop around 9:00 pm also to come home from school. Like most Korean children her age, she goes to school for about twelve hours a day, taking breaks for lunch and dinner. Most of this time is spent at public school, but some is spent at a private language institute called a hagwon. This strict educational discipline doesn’t really start until Middle School for most children, as students use their secondary years to prepare for the university entrance exams which will determine much of the rest of their futures.
Thus, I usually do not see the family until late at night, at which point they eat dinner while I watch, having already had mine around 6:00 pm (though with TKD running so late, I will begin eating dinner with them). After this, we usually watch some TV and talk in Konglish about whatever occurs to us. Sometimes, I will play a game with W. using the deck of cards I gave him as a gift. About every night, in fact, I have some sort of dialogue with W. in which he tries to teach me Korean and I teach him a little English. Sometimes, this leads to troublesome remarks from him. This conversation was in the context of a discussion about a former ETA the family had hosted:
W.: (pointing at my face) Olgul!
Me: (surprised, and pointing where he is pointing, i.e. at myself) Ugly?!
W.: (now, smiling with glee) Nae, Olgul!
W. abeo: (noticing my confusion) Olgul. You. Jacob. Same.
Me: Jacob and I are both ugly?!
W. abeo: (trying to correct my pronunciation) Ugly? No, Olgul.
Me: Olgul?
W. abeo: (now circling his face with his chopsticks) Nae, Olgul, olgul!
Me: Oh! Olgul! Face.
At which point, W. abeo gives a nervous chuckle, probably thinking to himself, “I hope the foreigner actually got it, because I have no idea what he just said.”
Communication can also be troublesome as I can only pick out bits and pieces of conversations. For instance, after I had gone upstairs to my room to sleep, I suddenly heard W. abeo and R. get into a heated discussion. All I could hear was the father saying, “Korean people (한국 사람)” and R. saying, “American people (미국 사람)”. What was even more troubling was that I could hear the rest of the conversation, but I couldn’t understand it. As the conversation sounded heated, I of course assumed the worse. “I’m not fitting in here. They want me out. And they hate all Americans now. Only R. can defend me. I have failed as a cultural ambassador and will be sent home in shame.” (I’m probably exaggerating my assumptions, but it’s for effect, so bear with me.)
It was with great trepidation that I descended the stairs the next morning and began eating breakfast with R. As soon as I saw an opening in the conversation, I asked R. what she and her father had talked about last night.
Me: I heard W. abeo and you talking last night, but all I could understand was 미국 사람 and 한국 사람.
R.: (Concentrates hard to figure out what I’m talking about.) I don’t remember. (She then talks hurriedly to her father in Korean. He looks confused and after a while responds. She still looks confused and says) He doesn’t remember.
Me: (lauging nervously) Okay.
It must not have been important then. I’ll just drop the topic, but then…
W. abeo: Oh! (Talks hurriedly in Korean to R.)
R.: Oh! (Thinks for a bit, translating I suppose.) American man. Cool man. Handsome man.
Me: The difference between “cool” and “handsome” for American men?
R.: Yes.
Me: Oh!
I then explain that I think cool is more about attitude, which I translate kibun (기분). A cool man doesn’t have to be handsome, though he certainly can be, because he has, in some way, an appealing way of approaching life. A handsome man is just looks.
So, I guess all that’s to say, I’ve landed in good hands here. I mean, if their heated discussion is about what the difference is between “cool” and “handsome”, then that sounds pretty good to me. Sounds like a family with good priorities, you know? I like discussing language heatedly too!
I do wish I could see my host family more often then I do. I’d like to interact with them more so that I feel less like a boarder and more like someone going through a new experience with them. But they’ve done this before. It’s their third time in fact. To them, I’m probably a little old hat. To me however, it’s just one grand adventure after another.
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